Friday, February 18, 2011

Live blogging at McDonald's

Often, I have a hell of a time updating blogs (or anything related to being online) because I don't have the internet at home. I can sometimes get an unsecured wifi signal but even that isn't very reliable and I often have to reconnect within minutes - usually when I'm about to do something important, like web banking or confirming something to be submitted.

So now I am sitting at McDonald's with Sara while she studies. Food and coffee (I don't even drink coffee, I'm a tea girl, but I'll take what I can get!). We're sitting next to a gaggle of old southern men who are rambling to one another about the gov'ment, semiautomatic weaponry and frequent mentions of Texas and Alabama  ("I want a translater," Sara just muttered under her breath). In fact, one man just asked another one to repeat himself with a loud "HUH?"though that could be either from not comprehending him or just not being able to hear because he's old. One of them just said, "I tell you what," just like Hank Hill would. This is a mesmerizing thing of beauty. Sara and I keep snickering in unison... these are the experiences I love to share with others.

Drinking more coffee - Sara says she's bringing me over to the dark side - it's actually really calming to be sitting here and finding ways to be productive. I intended to do some German work by copying a book I checked out of the library but for whatever reason, it's gone AWOL. I like it because it goes in depth with each section of grammar. I am not always the type to need someone to hold my hand when I'm learning something new, but another language is the type of thing I want to master as well as I can. A constant warning when learning a foreign language is to not associate said language with what its English equivalent should be, and I do get that. A simple example is in German one would say, "Ich gehe ins Bett." Literally translated to English, it's "I go in bed." But native English speakers know it's "I go to bed." I can accept the idea that languages have these types of differences with no problem, but I still like to know what the differences are because it helps me to understand why things work differently. Prepositions are weird. Gender and case are weird. German is weird. But I love it.

The old men are now joined by a flock of old women. They are apparently regulars; they all know each other by name. One woman is chiding a guy about how he hasn't lost any weight and his doctor will yell at him for it at his next appointment. (Why are you at McDonald's...?) 

Another old lady just said this verbatim: "I had never heard of the Tea Party until just recently. The last time I heard of the Tea Party was the Boston Tea Party. Some little girl had tea party dollies or something like that." The old man she was talking to walked by Sara and me earlier and gave us each a slip of paper.

I haven't done "a Google search" on this. I'll give you the pleasure of doing so and letting me know how child brides, Islamic law, women abuse and September 11 relate to each other. Let me know what you find out.
These old people next to us are now talking about different locations to go for dialysis like they're discussing their favorite restaurants. I am a little depressed by it. But it makes for good blog fodder. They've moved on to bladder infections and colonoscopies. This is what I have to look forward to in my old age!

Ugh, Hotel California is on the Muzak. I hate the fucking Eagles.

Tea Party lady is talking about her Social Security checks. The other ladies are talking about a guy on oxygen whose daughter is coming up from Tennessee to get him and take him away. Now someone else is going to rehab. Physical rehab? Drug rehab? Maybe both.

All I know is that it's hard to get anything accomplished right now because I'm enjoying live blogging old people at McDonald's too much.

An adorable couple. PLZ TO MOAR COFFEE.

The old ladies are beginning to dissipate. It's getting late and their children are coming to pick them up and bring them home. There's a creepy trucker-like guy they know who I think wants to sit down next to me. I am against this idea but I've done well enough to ignore them so far.

All I know is I got free dinner at McDonald's and I am jittery off of black coffee. The rule in my family is, "You aren't old enough to drink coffee unless you can drink it black." I am not one to stray from such golden rules.

Edit 8:14pm - The guy who gave us aforementioned paper slips came over as he was leaving and asked us how the wifi signal was. He told us he's a professor at Macomb and that he found out about all of this through a student who someone tried to recruit to their church to teach him how to use guns and kill police officers. He was wearing a veteran's trucker hat that had a patch tacked to it that read, "Remember 9-11!" Tea Party lady interrupted him mid-sentence and asked if he was coming or not, then told him she was going to wait in the car. I should expect nothing less from an establishment across the street from the Hazel Park Racetrack.

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